2/14/2007

I've seen it all now surely.....

Good Morning,
No I don't have any idea what the hell I'm doing up at this ungodly hour either. I expect the excitement of National Impotence Day compelled me to leap from my bed and make the most of what promises to be a fun packed twenty-four hours. I trust all you chaps will be keeping your flags lowered or at least at half mast for the duration. No one likes a show off!

It is also St Valentine's Day but I will be doing my best to ignore that for reasons I have discussed previously.

As if all that wasn't exciting enough, some fellow on ebay is flogging a diary containing the cure for cancer, the exact location of heaven, various prophecies and a solution for world peace as dictated to him by Jesus. Yes God's boy not someone else with the same name. I've been back to the page several times and that's what it says. Behold The Holy Diary!


It's very easy to be sceptical about this type of claim. I expect my readers in the chattering classes will be laughing and sneering in a most affected fashion even as I type. Incidentally how do you go about being chattering class? I've always fancied I'd be rather good at it. Is there a qualification or do you need to be born to it? As I was saying it's easy to be sceptical but can any of us prove that Jesus didn't dictate the diary?

Cheerio

5 comments:

alan said...

#4. JESUS REVEALED TO FUTURE TO ME: The future will go one of two ways...

My God, what a revelation!

I also like his responses to the ebay questions, including:

'God is human in nature, so He feels thoughts and feelings as we do. Therefore, He, like we, occassionally thinks, "If I created all things, then who created Me?" He, like we, gets an errie feeling if He thinks about this question too long.'

I feel an errie feeling just reading this. Not many bidders though ...

Fat Sparrow said...

Jesus told me that yer man's a nutter. Jesus also wants to know why he isn't getting a share of the profits from the diary. And he wants to know why he looks like a skinny dying fucker on all the crucifixes. And he says he wears boxers, not briefs.

Back to you later with further updates; the dog says I have to go kill whores now.

Clairwil said...

eeeek!

Jesus has told me that the fellow on ebay should invest in a spellchecker.

Bloody hell Fat Sparrow -a talking dog! You could make a fortune.

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