I'm Getting Thumped

Things have got unexpectedly exciting for the big meet next Friday. I have just been notified by e-mail that I'm getting a kicking.


I'll come along and give you a good thumping. Make sure your badge is well visible as I don't wanna be thumping the wrong person.

Love, ME'

Naturally I'm a bit surprised that anyone should wish to go to all that trouble for little me. Anyway I e-mailed back as follows;

Good stuff, I shall be wearing several badges to be easily identifiable. I'd hate for you to slip past and for me to miss the opportunity to rip your bowels out and shove them down your throat.
Wee tip for you son, sending e-mails threatening violence under a shitty made up name is not in the slightest bit terrifying. You'd be best picking on someone who can't fight back, like a toddler.


Now far be it from me to accuse anyone of cowerdice but I was very disappointed that my reply came back undelivered as the sender had not included a valid e-mail address in their message. What a bloody weed!

Next friday shall be very tense as I wait for my assasin. Anyone want to give odds of how quickly I reduce him to mince or indeed whether the big girls blouse turns up at all.



margin walker said...

Oh dear oh dear..

ill man said...

If he's too big a coward to leave a proper email address, then I doubt he'd be up for lamping you in a crowded pub. It's probably one of the 'anon's', Mummy's probably confiscated his child porn and he's a bit frustrated.

Pisces Iscariot said...

Anyone threatening to give a 'thumping' probably fights like a girl anyway. I'm sure you'll 'punch his fucking lights out'.

Anonymous said...

What delightful trolls you do get, Clairwil. Have a good night on Friday.

Dr Maroon said...

Oh well fuck that. I was swithering, but if anyone's threatening you, then I shall be there.
The big lad with the eyepatch behind the bar would batter anyone who came near you anyway.

Kind regards,
AHK Maroon.

Steve55 said...

Why do you get all the good trolls? I've only ever had one email complaining about something I wrote, and that was fair enough, cos I had slandered him. Even he didn't want to punch me though.

If this fellow does turn up, tell him to get on down to Manchester.

Clairwil said...

Thank-you everyone. I have always maintained that when you take on Clairwil, you take on an army. As the doctor correctly states the big lad with the eye-patch wouldn't stand for any of that nonsense. He fears no-one not even my mother.

Kim Ayres said...

I've only ever met up with one blogger I didn't know before hand, and that was Dr Maroon. Seemed like a pleasant enough fellow.

I'd love to join you but Glasgow's a bit far for a night out. Let me know if you're heading down to Castle Douglas at any time. I might even be able to stretch as far as Dumfries - not that I can think of anywhere pleasant to meet for a pint in Dumfries...

ill man said...

Is Dumfries a bit of a dive Kim?

Clairwil said...

Not we worry Kim. We've been known to travel before!

margin walker said...

I missed the night out! Arrgh!

Anonymous said...

can u not see why people want to hurt you. u are the all time bad bich. u wind people up and wont taker you're just desserts. fucking mongoliod howhre.

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