Hello,
I know it goes against the grain a bit for me to be defending a Glasgow Labour councillor but whatever political differences I may have with 'The Purcell' I'm not happy to see him go and am fairly sickened by some of the web/media coverage of his resignation. Whatever my political beefs with the council, not least some of the school closures, the disputes with the trade unions and their rather shabby treatment of the fine folk from the cleansing department, gloating over this is an ugly sight. Say what you like about Purcell but he was the first Glasgow City Council leader in a very long time to be able to appear on the telly without you wanting to throw rocks at the thing to make the sheer toe curling shame stop.
I have no idea what the truth surrounding his resignation is, though I have heard a few rumours some credible and some of such a pathetic 'nudge nudge wink wink you do know he's a poof' nature that it's a miracle I am not doing time for assault or worse. I really have no earthly idea why your anti-gay type, in common with racists and misogynists need to be so evangelical with their views. Time and time again I've tried to terminate cliche ridden hate rants by informing the preacher that I'm not overly fussed by homosexuality, cannot help but think their ex-wife must have had a certain amount of right on her side and harbour no hatred towards Pakistanis.
Nothing works. Not even informing them that I am a leading member of the pc brigade and can have them thrown in prison for expressing un -pc views. I can't do any such thing and I've never met this pc brigade that persecutes Daily Mail readers so. It's desperation that makes me say these things. And so I stand flecked with someone else's spittle wishing the longest hard luck story in living memory would just end.
Incidentally my mother quite out of the blue has stopped buying the Daily Mail and informs me that it it an 'evil lying rag that ruins peoples lives'. As she and it are at one politically and I cannot get her to disclose what has offended her so much, I'd be delighted if anyone could supply me with any information that would help me get to the bottom of this strange but welcome conversion. Has Tanya Gold been writing for them again?
To return to Mr Purcell, I'm fairly irritated by the faux piety on display re the 'chemical dependency' rumours. Virtually everyone in politics is a rotten hypocrite on the subject of drugs not always by inclination but because if they were remotely honest about it the tabloids would rip them to bits, cheered on by a drink/drunk addled public who would do well to pay close attention to this poem by Burns before casting stones around their conservatories. I should also point out to my fellow Labour haters of all stripes that when the shoe is on the other foot and it will be, you'll all be squealing like Violet Elizabeth Bott about the unfairness of it all. Will you be happy to have your sneering and grinning cast up when it's your guy or girl in the firing line?
So before I'm compelled to record a 'leave Steven alone' You Tube clip can we skip all the 'much as it pains me to ask but I think only of the public interest' guff? Like I say I've no idea what truth there is in the 'chemical dependency' rumours but as he's resigned all his council positions it's no longer any of our business. The question as to whether any 'chemical dependency' affected his council duties answers itself -if you have to ask, then no it didn't. In any case even if it did what do you want to happen? Should the council re-employ him so that they can sack him for alleged 'chemical dependency'? Would you be happy to see one of the recreational drug or alcohol users you know treated that way? Really? Then you're a cunt.
Unless he's been accused of serious corruption or doing something unsavoury with my council taxes, I have no interest in knowing why he resigned. He had an office full of very capable staff who could pick up the slack if he wasn't up to the job. The hysterical notion that Glasgow was in the hands of a drug crazed Nero is as misguided as it is dishonest.
I love good gossip as much as the next man but tarting it up as concern for Glasgow is hypocrisy of the highest order.
Cheerio
Showing posts with label Glasgow. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Glasgow. Show all posts
3/04/2010
10/04/2009
A Plea for Mercy.
Hello,
Something has been troubling me for a while now. First some background. I can be quite sensitive about certain things. Well that's what they tell me, I believe I just have higher standards than most other people but whatever, I have been known to attract derisive laughter when I explain what's troubling me. Make of that what you will.
I came off the happy pills a while back and a few initial wobbles aside it's gone quite well until now. I can be walking along the street quite happily when it -the awful thing assaults my poor eyes. A visual rape I am powerless to defend my goggles against. My human rights are being abused.
It's the new Celtic away strip. Why would they do something like this to innocent people? I like Celtic, admittedly only because they're from Glasgow and the alternatives are unspeakable. Also someone told me that Celtic keep all their money in a biscuit tin like a pensioner that doesn't trust banks which I think is rather wonderful. But none of this alters the fact that they have committed a crime against humanity. For God's sake look at the wretched thing! It's the sportswear version of Medusa. Don't look into it's hoops! You'll end up like Lot's wife or worse.
If it were only worn by Celtic players that would be tolerable as it would only be seen by consenting adults and children with appropriate adult supervision. That isn't what's happening though. Almost everyone in Glasgow is wearing the garment of aesthetic evil. Despite it's obvious ugliness it's a hard thing to look away from. Like a road accident or a decomposing set of Siamese twins. Only worse.
Women are wearing it. Fat people are wearing it. Creatures that look like they come from the Gallowgate are wearing it. Dear Lord I wouldn't raise an eyebrow if huns were wearing it. As I was saying to Mr Clairwil last night there is a very real chance that Celtic's bad style choices are going to put me under the doctor again. Fond as I am of Dr Lindsay and our little chats I prefer to run my own show.
I'm trying to stay strong but this abomination unto the Lord God has to stop. Surely some moderate Celtic fans could make their voices heard and make this visual hell stop. Failing that I could ask some of my mates from the knitting scene to rustle up an acceptable alternative. Either way someone has to act.
Cheerio
Something has been troubling me for a while now. First some background. I can be quite sensitive about certain things. Well that's what they tell me, I believe I just have higher standards than most other people but whatever, I have been known to attract derisive laughter when I explain what's troubling me. Make of that what you will.
I came off the happy pills a while back and a few initial wobbles aside it's gone quite well until now. I can be walking along the street quite happily when it -the awful thing assaults my poor eyes. A visual rape I am powerless to defend my goggles against. My human rights are being abused.
It's the new Celtic away strip. Why would they do something like this to innocent people? I like Celtic, admittedly only because they're from Glasgow and the alternatives are unspeakable. Also someone told me that Celtic keep all their money in a biscuit tin like a pensioner that doesn't trust banks which I think is rather wonderful. But none of this alters the fact that they have committed a crime against humanity. For God's sake look at the wretched thing! It's the sportswear version of Medusa. Don't look into it's hoops! You'll end up like Lot's wife or worse.
If it were only worn by Celtic players that would be tolerable as it would only be seen by consenting adults and children with appropriate adult supervision. That isn't what's happening though. Almost everyone in Glasgow is wearing the garment of aesthetic evil. Despite it's obvious ugliness it's a hard thing to look away from. Like a road accident or a decomposing set of Siamese twins. Only worse.
Women are wearing it. Fat people are wearing it. Creatures that look like they come from the Gallowgate are wearing it. Dear Lord I wouldn't raise an eyebrow if huns were wearing it. As I was saying to Mr Clairwil last night there is a very real chance that Celtic's bad style choices are going to put me under the doctor again. Fond as I am of Dr Lindsay and our little chats I prefer to run my own show.
I'm trying to stay strong but this abomination unto the Lord God has to stop. Surely some moderate Celtic fans could make their voices heard and make this visual hell stop. Failing that I could ask some of my mates from the knitting scene to rustle up an acceptable alternative. Either way someone has to act.
Cheerio
4/13/2009
10/28/2008
Last Chance To Save Paddy's Market
Hello,
Despite the efforts of the SNP and the Greens on Glasgow City Council the loathsome Labour group have succeeded in getting their filthy, corrupt mitts on Paddy's Market. This doesn't automatically mean the end but it does mean it's more vital than ever to get onto your councillor and tell them you support the traders -you can get their details here.
Make no mistake this decision by the council has nothing to do with crime and everything to do with the phoney yuppiefication that the city neither wants nor needs. You might not like Paddy's but enough people do to support numerous viable businesses. If they win this it will be The Barras next and then we'll be the only city on the face of the earth without markets but one of many with faceless boring high streets and naff shopping centres.
The Labour council has been the worst enemy this city ever had. They are nothing but unimaginative, small minded, dishonest, bloated thieves and bullies. It's high time the people reminded them who is in charge.
Oh don't forget to sign the petition!
Cheerio
P.S This is rather good!
Despite the efforts of the SNP and the Greens on Glasgow City Council the loathsome Labour group have succeeded in getting their filthy, corrupt mitts on Paddy's Market. This doesn't automatically mean the end but it does mean it's more vital than ever to get onto your councillor and tell them you support the traders -you can get their details here.
Make no mistake this decision by the council has nothing to do with crime and everything to do with the phoney yuppiefication that the city neither wants nor needs. You might not like Paddy's but enough people do to support numerous viable businesses. If they win this it will be The Barras next and then we'll be the only city on the face of the earth without markets but one of many with faceless boring high streets and naff shopping centres.
The Labour council has been the worst enemy this city ever had. They are nothing but unimaginative, small minded, dishonest, bloated thieves and bullies. It's high time the people reminded them who is in charge.
Oh don't forget to sign the petition!
Cheerio
P.S This is rather good!
8/10/2008
Rather Exciting News
Hello,
In my post below on my guerrilla gardening activities I mentioned my involvement in something rather exciting later in the month which I have no doubt had you all intrigued. Well I can now put you all out of your misery.
On either the 20th or 21st of August Richard Reynolds and the folk from Sky TV are coming up to Glasgow to film a very ambitious guerrilla gardening project a mere stones throw from my home in the city centre for a show presented by Noel Edmonds -yes the bearded TV monarch of Swap Shop fame!
The area chosen is rather overgrown and uncared for but has the potential to be a rather fine stretch of land for the whole community to enjoy. Which is why we need your help. I've agreed to take on the ongoing maintenance of the land after the cameras go but it's going to take a team effort to have something worth maintaining.
Obviously I would be delighted to accept any offers of long term help but even if you just fancy giving guerrilla gardening a go or getting your mug on telly you're welcome to come along. The dig will take place in the evening so you don't even need to take time off work -unless you work shifts. Whatever your level of interest or motive for coming along your help really will be appreciated and it should be a good and rewarding evening.
For those who have been struggling to get a troop together this will be a great opportunity to meet potential recruits and for those who prefer to work solo the area is large enough to allow you to take ownership of your own patch in the longer term.
If you'd like to come along please email me for details or keep an eye on the Guerrilla Gardening forum for further updates. Should anyone wish to take a look at the area before committing themselves it is the lane the adjoins Stirling Street and Parson Street near St Mungos R.C Church.
Should you know anyone who might be interested please direct them to this post or to the Guerrilla Gardening forum. I'd also be very grateful for any links to this post to try and attract as much help as possible.
Cheerio
7/31/2008
6/30/2008
Are You All On Crack Or Something?
Hello,
It's an old one but it still baffles me. What on earth has Labour done to inspire such loyalty in Glasgow? What do people think they'll lose of they go wild and give another party a go? I merely ask because having read this Scotsman article I'm none the wiser.
The article concerns the forthcoming Glasgow East by-election and quotes a fellow named John Smith who describes himself as a Labour man and will be voting Labour because 'everyone here votes Labour'. I'm sure Mr Smith is very pleasant but is he a sheep or something? Does he think he's in there to pick the likely winner rather than choose the best candidate? For heavens sake it's a ballot paper not a betting slip. Someone take this man to a library or show him his payslips before and after he got walloped with a tax increase.
The east end is home to many low paid workers. Could they be the only electorate in history to respond to a tax increase they can ill afford by rewarding the party who inflicted it on them with electoral victory?
It's reasonable to assume that if a party is returned to power over several elections then the electorate are reasonably happy with them but it's hard to see what there is to be happy about in Glasgow East, unless of course it's populated by a higher than usual percentage of masochists. Nevertheless let's examine what a million years uninterrupted Labour rule have done for the good folk to my east.
1. It's the poorest area in the whole of Britain.
2. It's the unhealthiest area in the whole of Britain - life expectancy for men 63 for women 74.
3. 63% of children live in homes on benefits.
One constituent a Jeanette West is somewhat disillusioned with Labour;
'Nothing seems to get done, we need more police on the streets and we need the potholes in the roads fixed and it just hasn't happened.'
Oh come on Jeanette they've only had decades in power give them a chance. Still it's good to see someone is thinking but what will it take for the rest of the electorate to make the connection between who they elect and the state of the place they live in.
I cannot help but think that the journalist who wrote the article missed a trick. I'd have been forced to ask what exactly Labour does from them and why do they regard it as better than the other parties. Then again the poor guy was probably in a state of shock.
What are the voting for exactly? As far as I can tell high crime, high tax, junkies cluttering up the place, pointless health initiates that achieve nothing, low investment, dubious expenses claims, and total government and council indifference. I wouldn't mind if benefits were really as generous as certain folk make out but if it's benefits that keep them voting Labour then we really are in worse trouble than I thought. If you're out for cash at least try and get enough for more than a weeks messages from Farmfoods out the bastards.
It is of course up to the people of Glasgow East who they vote for, even if their behaviour does suggest mass hypnosis. However given the abysmal standard of the candidates they send to Westminster and Holyrood with depressing predictability I think the rest of us are at least entitled to ask why. Other than the MPs and MSPs themselves it's not clear who benefits from this rather one sided love affair.
Cheerio
It's an old one but it still baffles me. What on earth has Labour done to inspire such loyalty in Glasgow? What do people think they'll lose of they go wild and give another party a go? I merely ask because having read this Scotsman article I'm none the wiser.
The article concerns the forthcoming Glasgow East by-election and quotes a fellow named John Smith who describes himself as a Labour man and will be voting Labour because 'everyone here votes Labour'. I'm sure Mr Smith is very pleasant but is he a sheep or something? Does he think he's in there to pick the likely winner rather than choose the best candidate? For heavens sake it's a ballot paper not a betting slip. Someone take this man to a library or show him his payslips before and after he got walloped with a tax increase.
The east end is home to many low paid workers. Could they be the only electorate in history to respond to a tax increase they can ill afford by rewarding the party who inflicted it on them with electoral victory?
It's reasonable to assume that if a party is returned to power over several elections then the electorate are reasonably happy with them but it's hard to see what there is to be happy about in Glasgow East, unless of course it's populated by a higher than usual percentage of masochists. Nevertheless let's examine what a million years uninterrupted Labour rule have done for the good folk to my east.
1. It's the poorest area in the whole of Britain.
2. It's the unhealthiest area in the whole of Britain - life expectancy for men 63 for women 74.
3. 63% of children live in homes on benefits.
One constituent a Jeanette West is somewhat disillusioned with Labour;
'Nothing seems to get done, we need more police on the streets and we need the potholes in the roads fixed and it just hasn't happened.'
Oh come on Jeanette they've only had decades in power give them a chance. Still it's good to see someone is thinking but what will it take for the rest of the electorate to make the connection between who they elect and the state of the place they live in.
I cannot help but think that the journalist who wrote the article missed a trick. I'd have been forced to ask what exactly Labour does from them and why do they regard it as better than the other parties. Then again the poor guy was probably in a state of shock.
What are the voting for exactly? As far as I can tell high crime, high tax, junkies cluttering up the place, pointless health initiates that achieve nothing, low investment, dubious expenses claims, and total government and council indifference. I wouldn't mind if benefits were really as generous as certain folk make out but if it's benefits that keep them voting Labour then we really are in worse trouble than I thought. If you're out for cash at least try and get enough for more than a weeks messages from Farmfoods out the bastards.
It is of course up to the people of Glasgow East who they vote for, even if their behaviour does suggest mass hypnosis. However given the abysmal standard of the candidates they send to Westminster and Holyrood with depressing predictability I think the rest of us are at least entitled to ask why. Other than the MPs and MSPs themselves it's not clear who benefits from this rather one sided love affair.
Cheerio
6/24/2008
Yes It Is My Tree!
Hello,
Glasgow being a city populated by people that cannot mind their own business is not a difficult city to stand out in. Today having popped into the garden centre and purchased a few plants I then had the task of getting them down the road.
The way the folk on the bus were carrying on you'd have thought I was wearing fancy dress. The drunks were shouting about trees, the neds thought it was a hash plant and the gawpers gawped. Honestly it was pandemonium.
Speaking of pandemonium does anyone know what the mysterious event that caused traffic to be diverted from the top of Renfield Street earlier today? The police were being very tight lipped -bloody spoilsports. I can't say work were very impressed when I told them I was late as a result of a 'mysterious event'.
Then again they did drop the bombshell that some charity or another has stumped up some money to extend my contract by two months.
Glasgow being a city populated by people that cannot mind their own business is not a difficult city to stand out in. Today having popped into the garden centre and purchased a few plants I then had the task of getting them down the road.
The way the folk on the bus were carrying on you'd have thought I was wearing fancy dress. The drunks were shouting about trees, the neds thought it was a hash plant and the gawpers gawped. Honestly it was pandemonium.
Speaking of pandemonium does anyone know what the mysterious event that caused traffic to be diverted from the top of Renfield Street earlier today? The police were being very tight lipped -bloody spoilsports. I can't say work were very impressed when I told them I was late as a result of a 'mysterious event'.
Then again they did drop the bombshell that some charity or another has stumped up some money to extend my contract by two months.
4/27/2008
I'm going to be on telly!
Hello,
Don't get all excited! Sadly the BBC haven't seen sense and given me my own show. Lord knows why I'd love a show. I'm thinking of something along the lines of a chat show where I get to choose the guests. So instead of speaking to someone from Eastenders who has just released a fitness video I might have an expert on seahorses drop in with Barbara Windsor and someone I found on the bus. God I don't know why I'm bothering to go into all this. It isn't going to happen.
Instead I am merely going to be a star of CCTV. Our wonderful Labour council here in Glasgow have decided to splash out on £300,000 worth of CCTV coverage of my stamping ground. Of course my fantastic local councillor Gordon Matheson is quick to point out that 'The Merchant City is not a high crime area but the residential population is growing rapidly and there is a substantial night-time economy. This is why we are installing a network of CCTV cameras.'
I must say I'm somewhat puzzled by this because a few weeks Gordy boy was telling us that Paddy's Market was the cause of an unacceptably high level of crime and that the local residents were suffering as a result.
More peculiar still he describes the pubs in the area as the night-time economy and to be fair many of them aren't a problem but a fair number of them are. I have written to Mr Matheson to complain about the antics of the patrons of the night time economy on several occasions but have yet to receive a response or see any improvement in the situation. Only this evening I got home at 8pm to find the front door covered in sectarian graffiti and the entry panel ripped off the door. To get to this I had to walk through the carpet of fag butts that the night time economy seems to produce post-smoking ban and the pools of piss that folk too anti-social to use the toilet pop out the pub to decorate the the street with. I will also be woken up at least once tonight by the racket made by the night time economy as it retreats to the suburbs. I should point out that I'm a heavy sleeper, for example I once slept through the fire brigade evacuating the flats next door and was stunned to read about it the paper the following day.
I bought my house eight years ago for the princely sum of £46,000 so I'm well aware that I'm part of the scum element that Mr Matheson wishes would vanish. As I'm neither a big brewery or a landlord renting out luxury apartments my quality of life is an irrelevance. Funnily enough if I hadn't been aware Paddy's Market existed prior to buying my house I'd still be oblivious to it's existence. Yet that is Gordy's main issue. I expect that if the Paddy's traders could afford to make it worth Gordon's while to support them they'd be fine.
The Merchant City is by no means a crime blackspot but it is blighted by drunken anti-social behaviour of an evening. You might imagine that the council would seek to tackle this but instead every encouragement is given to big chain pubs to come here, let their customers get rat arsed and wash their hand of them. CCTV will change nothing. What disrupts the peace in these parts is provisional IRA obsessed piss heads roaring and singing. Are the council seriously asserting that the installation of cameras will shut these wankers up? Oh and no the the irony of such anti-social beasts being so in love with the provisionals has not escaped my notice given the IRA's knee-capping response to anti-social behaviour. In any case it is perfectly possible to support the IRA quietly -I did for years when I was the left wing equivalent of the Daily Mail, a dogmatic mental and fifteen years old.
It is clear to me that the council couldn't care less about crime which begs the question what do the want with the CCTV footage. My best guess is that the plan to flog footage of fit birds getting humped over the bins to the highest bidder. The notion that a city would continually elect halfwits who will devote twice the energy to being seen to be doing something as it actually takes to tackle the problem is too implausible to believe.
Cheerio
Don't get all excited! Sadly the BBC haven't seen sense and given me my own show. Lord knows why I'd love a show. I'm thinking of something along the lines of a chat show where I get to choose the guests. So instead of speaking to someone from Eastenders who has just released a fitness video I might have an expert on seahorses drop in with Barbara Windsor and someone I found on the bus. God I don't know why I'm bothering to go into all this. It isn't going to happen.
Instead I am merely going to be a star of CCTV. Our wonderful Labour council here in Glasgow have decided to splash out on £300,000 worth of CCTV coverage of my stamping ground. Of course my fantastic local councillor Gordon Matheson is quick to point out that 'The Merchant City is not a high crime area but the residential population is growing rapidly and there is a substantial night-time economy. This is why we are installing a network of CCTV cameras.'
I must say I'm somewhat puzzled by this because a few weeks Gordy boy was telling us that Paddy's Market was the cause of an unacceptably high level of crime and that the local residents were suffering as a result.
More peculiar still he describes the pubs in the area as the night-time economy and to be fair many of them aren't a problem but a fair number of them are. I have written to Mr Matheson to complain about the antics of the patrons of the night time economy on several occasions but have yet to receive a response or see any improvement in the situation. Only this evening I got home at 8pm to find the front door covered in sectarian graffiti and the entry panel ripped off the door. To get to this I had to walk through the carpet of fag butts that the night time economy seems to produce post-smoking ban and the pools of piss that folk too anti-social to use the toilet pop out the pub to decorate the the street with. I will also be woken up at least once tonight by the racket made by the night time economy as it retreats to the suburbs. I should point out that I'm a heavy sleeper, for example I once slept through the fire brigade evacuating the flats next door and was stunned to read about it the paper the following day.
I bought my house eight years ago for the princely sum of £46,000 so I'm well aware that I'm part of the scum element that Mr Matheson wishes would vanish. As I'm neither a big brewery or a landlord renting out luxury apartments my quality of life is an irrelevance. Funnily enough if I hadn't been aware Paddy's Market existed prior to buying my house I'd still be oblivious to it's existence. Yet that is Gordy's main issue. I expect that if the Paddy's traders could afford to make it worth Gordon's while to support them they'd be fine.
The Merchant City is by no means a crime blackspot but it is blighted by drunken anti-social behaviour of an evening. You might imagine that the council would seek to tackle this but instead every encouragement is given to big chain pubs to come here, let their customers get rat arsed and wash their hand of them. CCTV will change nothing. What disrupts the peace in these parts is provisional IRA obsessed piss heads roaring and singing. Are the council seriously asserting that the installation of cameras will shut these wankers up? Oh and no the the irony of such anti-social beasts being so in love with the provisionals has not escaped my notice given the IRA's knee-capping response to anti-social behaviour. In any case it is perfectly possible to support the IRA quietly -I did for years when I was the left wing equivalent of the Daily Mail, a dogmatic mental and fifteen years old.
It is clear to me that the council couldn't care less about crime which begs the question what do the want with the CCTV footage. My best guess is that the plan to flog footage of fit birds getting humped over the bins to the highest bidder. The notion that a city would continually elect halfwits who will devote twice the energy to being seen to be doing something as it actually takes to tackle the problem is too implausible to believe.
Cheerio
4/14/2008
Save Paddy's
Hello,
As some of you may recall I blogged a while back about the cretins in the City Chambers and their plans to shut Paddy's Market.
Don't get excited I'm not about to announce that they read the post and realised the error of their ways -the chance would be a fine thing. No the council are as determined as ever to free the city from the awful scourge of businesses like this.
I am pleased to report that I'm not alone in my outrage over the council's latest move in the march towards GlasgowLand. There is a petition on the go and a blog keeping us up to date on the campaign latest.
So riled am I, I've also put together my own little site to draw attention to the plight of Paddy's Market.
Now get over there and lend your support or I'll kick your arse.
Cheerio
As some of you may recall I blogged a while back about the cretins in the City Chambers and their plans to shut Paddy's Market.
Don't get excited I'm not about to announce that they read the post and realised the error of their ways -the chance would be a fine thing. No the council are as determined as ever to free the city from the awful scourge of businesses like this.
I am pleased to report that I'm not alone in my outrage over the council's latest move in the march towards GlasgowLand. There is a petition on the go and a blog keeping us up to date on the campaign latest.
So riled am I, I've also put together my own little site to draw attention to the plight of Paddy's Market.
Now get over there and lend your support or I'll kick your arse.
Cheerio
4/07/2008
God It's Hard To Blog/ Save the Lollies
Hello,
It may be a peculiar quirk exclusive to me but it's bloody hard to blog when you're happy. Readers may be delighted to hear that I'm feeling very chipper. I've been very busy over the last week with my business stuff and was on a course in London over the weekend.
My tail is also in the air because I've just realised that my current business plan whilst good is rather too ambitious for a start up with my limited resources. I was chatting to someone over the weekend and suddenly realised that I've horribly over complicated everything. I need to sit down and do some hard sums and make a few phone calls but if I'm right I could be in business within the next couple of months. Not only that but I'll have the basis for a plan to expand my business within the next 18 months. I'm also grappling with a job application as I need a stop gap job while I'm getting started and this job pays a good £6000 per year more than my current one, is within walking distance of my home and if I'm honest is one of those made up jobs that provide one of the few skiving opportunities left to the 21st century worker. Assuming I'm successful I'd like to offer my sincere apologies to the tax payer but may it comfort them to know that they'll be helping to fund a business start up so it's not a complete waste.
Still that's enough about me. I want to draw your attention to the plight of the poor Lollipop men and women of Glasgow. The council in it's infinite wisdom has decided to get them picking up litter in addition to their other tasks. In fairness the council have given them a choice they can either pick up litter or take a cut in hours and pay.
Such is the climate of lunacy in the City Chambers they actually think this will make it easier to recruit new lollies. People this is how stupid they think we are and can you blame them? Why do we as a city trot along year after year and vote Labour muttering darkly that we 'cannae let a tory in'. My mums local councillor is a tory and having been in the position for roughly a million years is as pointless and complacent as any Labour councillor. Quite why the thought of a waster in a blue rosette is more terrifying than one in a red rosette has never been explained. All I know is that they must not be let in. Quite frankly I'm not fussy I'd rather The Natural Law Party were in charge than Labour.
Giving the poor lollies more work is an admission of failure on the part of the management of the cleansing department. Let's face it they've proven that the litter problem can be effectively managed -my fellow residents may recall how clean the city was when the Commonwealth Games application was under consideration. I'm awful for getting swept up in things but I foolishly thought that at last the council were starting to get it right. How wrong I was, we were like a fat man holding his stomach in as an attractive woman strolls by. As soon as the application was successful we let our muscles relax and started chucking half eaten kebabs about again.
Of course the wages paid to street sweepers are higher than those received by the lollies which has more to do with the decision than anything else. I understand that the council have a budget to work to and when limited funds are available sometimes cuts have to be made. However I presume the litter that is being dropped by school children and their half-witted parents on the way to school. So instead of making a badly paid but useful job harder why not get the schools involved and get the kiddiewinks litter picking? This would provide the children with an incentive not to drop litter, teach them an important lesson about actions and their consequences and make the place look better. Better still get them to sort the rubbish for recycling and teach them about all the marvellous things that can be made from rubbish if it's put in the correct place. It could be a nice little project for them they could write an essay on it or stand on a chair and bark or whatever it is they get up to in schools nowadays.
Failing that I note that councillors are now paid for their work surely with a bit of time management they could double up a litter pickers. I'm perfectly serious. I'd be rather impressed with any councillor willing to get their hands dirty and pitch in with the rest of us to improve the city. Unless of course our good 'socialist' councillors are far too grand for that sort of thing and would rather place the burden on the lowest paid workers instead.
It may be a peculiar quirk exclusive to me but it's bloody hard to blog when you're happy. Readers may be delighted to hear that I'm feeling very chipper. I've been very busy over the last week with my business stuff and was on a course in London over the weekend.
My tail is also in the air because I've just realised that my current business plan whilst good is rather too ambitious for a start up with my limited resources. I was chatting to someone over the weekend and suddenly realised that I've horribly over complicated everything. I need to sit down and do some hard sums and make a few phone calls but if I'm right I could be in business within the next couple of months. Not only that but I'll have the basis for a plan to expand my business within the next 18 months. I'm also grappling with a job application as I need a stop gap job while I'm getting started and this job pays a good £6000 per year more than my current one, is within walking distance of my home and if I'm honest is one of those made up jobs that provide one of the few skiving opportunities left to the 21st century worker. Assuming I'm successful I'd like to offer my sincere apologies to the tax payer but may it comfort them to know that they'll be helping to fund a business start up so it's not a complete waste.
Still that's enough about me. I want to draw your attention to the plight of the poor Lollipop men and women of Glasgow. The council in it's infinite wisdom has decided to get them picking up litter in addition to their other tasks. In fairness the council have given them a choice they can either pick up litter or take a cut in hours and pay.
Such is the climate of lunacy in the City Chambers they actually think this will make it easier to recruit new lollies. People this is how stupid they think we are and can you blame them? Why do we as a city trot along year after year and vote Labour muttering darkly that we 'cannae let a tory in'. My mums local councillor is a tory and having been in the position for roughly a million years is as pointless and complacent as any Labour councillor. Quite why the thought of a waster in a blue rosette is more terrifying than one in a red rosette has never been explained. All I know is that they must not be let in. Quite frankly I'm not fussy I'd rather The Natural Law Party were in charge than Labour.
Giving the poor lollies more work is an admission of failure on the part of the management of the cleansing department. Let's face it they've proven that the litter problem can be effectively managed -my fellow residents may recall how clean the city was when the Commonwealth Games application was under consideration. I'm awful for getting swept up in things but I foolishly thought that at last the council were starting to get it right. How wrong I was, we were like a fat man holding his stomach in as an attractive woman strolls by. As soon as the application was successful we let our muscles relax and started chucking half eaten kebabs about again.
Of course the wages paid to street sweepers are higher than those received by the lollies which has more to do with the decision than anything else. I understand that the council have a budget to work to and when limited funds are available sometimes cuts have to be made. However I presume the litter that is being dropped by school children and their half-witted parents on the way to school. So instead of making a badly paid but useful job harder why not get the schools involved and get the kiddiewinks litter picking? This would provide the children with an incentive not to drop litter, teach them an important lesson about actions and their consequences and make the place look better. Better still get them to sort the rubbish for recycling and teach them about all the marvellous things that can be made from rubbish if it's put in the correct place. It could be a nice little project for them they could write an essay on it or stand on a chair and bark or whatever it is they get up to in schools nowadays.
Failing that I note that councillors are now paid for their work surely with a bit of time management they could double up a litter pickers. I'm perfectly serious. I'd be rather impressed with any councillor willing to get their hands dirty and pitch in with the rest of us to improve the city. Unless of course our good 'socialist' councillors are far too grand for that sort of thing and would rather place the burden on the lowest paid workers instead.
3/14/2008
A Sterile Bubble Of Privilege!
'For all their fancy words, what these members and officials of Glasgow City Council actually want to do is turn the city centre into a sterile bubble of privilege, where their chosen 'elite' can pretend the whole city is basking in the glow of trickle-down economics... they should be ashamed, but of course they're not!'
-Sydney Meriwether, one of Glasgow's more intelligent residents.
Hello,
Is there anything Glasgow City Council can do without making a complete arse of it? I merely ask because it would appear that at long last they've finally got their way over Paddy's Market. The council have been gurning and whining about Paddy's Market for years because it has the effrontery to be a bit on the rough side. As we all know the city council has an instinctive loathing for anything authentically Glaswegian. Anything that isn't a bland third rate, overpriced 'continental' snore fest is to be outlawed.
According to my useless local councillor Gordon Matheson the market has been making the lives of local residents a misery for years. According to Gordy boy 'The community I represent has suffered for long enough and Glasgow can no longer tolerate what I've called a crime-ridden midden.' It's funny but in the eight years I've lived here it has never once caused me even mild irritation, let alone suffering. Things like excessive noise from certain local pubs, rowdy and aggressive football fans, litter and insufficient rubbish collection have caused me a fair bit of suffering over the years but for some reason Councillor Matheson has never bothered replying to my polite letters on the subject or doing anything to remedy the situation. In fact all he appears to do for the area is spout crap in the papers from time to time.
The council is still sticking to the line that the market is a hotbed of crime which to be fair it is. However if my house was burgled on a regular basis I wouldn't demolish it in an effort to solve the problem. Instead I'd get onto the police and demand something was done. In addition to the usual counterfeit goods found at almost every market in the world Paddy's seems to have a significant number of drug dealers hanging about. I hate to sound like a conspiracy theorist but if open drug dealing at Paddys was taking place and the council knew about it. Why have the police not taken serious action to stamp the problem out? Either the council have failed to put pressure on the police to tackle the problem to give them an excuse to get rid of the market or the police have turned a blind eye. I was of the impression the police were under a fair bit of pressure to make arrests, it appears they've chosen not to make what sound like very easy arrests, which makes me very suspicious. Could it be that Strathclyde's finest are taking a bung from somewhere? Local rumour has it that the rampant crime in parts of North Glasgow can be partly attributed to corrupt police taking bungs to let their gangster chums run wild -it's not impossible. Alternatively the council could just be lying or exaggerating which let's face it would be pretty much business as usual for that arrogant shower of Labour pigs.
Remarkably the council do not intend to flog the Paddy's Market site off to developers to build another shopping centre or clutter up with a load of permanently vacant 'luxury' apartments. Oh no they have plans! Paddy's will remain a market but a 'mini-Camden Market' -God forbid anything should happen in Glasgow that hasn't been ripped off from a larger city. Frankly I'm amazed the 'continent' wasn't mentioned. For those of you who don't know the continent is a magical place where everything is better and more civilised than Britain. To be fair they have a point, what I love about the continent is the constant smoking, the long lunches, the strikes, the public holidays, complete absence of enforcement of EU directives and the mad driving. It also feels authentic which is more than can be said for this third rate theme park. Why do they never want to copy any of the fun stuff?
Not only are we getting a fake Camden Market but it will be 'cultural' as well. That doesn't mean there will be stalls flogging bassoons to classical musicians but that there will be immigrants with stalls selling foreign gee-gaws. Good God where would we all be without the the council? Instead of leaving the various new immigrant groups in Glasgow get on with opening restaurants, delis and shops as they have been doing for the last few years, the poor sods are to be herded into a doomed market to add a bit of 'colour'. It may surprise the council to learn the immigrants have been lending a bit of 'colour' to Paddy's for a while now by shopping in it. This sort of thrifty behaviour is what allows them to save up and start their own businesses, study for professional qualifications or put their children through school. In fact Paddy's was started by immigrant Irish traders in the day's before foreigners were reduced to the status of window dressing by unconsciously racist morons.
You will note above that I describe the market as 'doomed'. I'd love to be proved wrong on that score. Having run a small retail business in Glasgow I know just how valuable cheap premises are. Glasgow is not an easy city to trade in for the independant retailer in part due to the locals love of big brands names and the council's embarrassing willingness to behave like the chain store's lapdog. Honestly the Argyle St branch of Marks and Spencer could start selling child sex slaves for 50p and the council would still praise them to the skies. Anyway I've wandered. Why is the market doomed? Well it is situated between Kings Court and The Briggait. Kings Court is full of the sort of arty retailers the council wants to lure to the kiddy on Camden. Well I say full what I mean is in between the empty units. Those retailers still trading in Kings Court are hanging on by their fingernails. It's a vicious circle, they get little passing trade but can't afford to do any proper advertising to attract customers and so they limp on counting the pennies and dreaming of the pounds. Not that the council lift a finger to help them out of course. Why spend a couple of thousand promoting small retailers when you can blow millions promoting the upmarket chain stores on Buchanan St. As for The Briggait with hindsight this was a warning about the direction this city is heading in. For no real reason the council decided to turn this into an upmarket shopping centre in the 1980s in a city with at that time record unemployment levels and on a street with little passing trade. Would you be amazed to learn that it bombed? The last I heard the premises were being used by some arts group.
I am no business expert but common sense alone suggests that the enforced yuppiefication of that areas retail sector is doomed to fail. For heaven's sake it's the central east end. People want bargains -cheap fags, cheap furniture, cheap clothes, gold chains that turn your neck green, pirate DVDs and old dustbin lids. If we want a fair trade rug produced on a handloom by a disabled goat in Peru then we go to the west end. To put it in newspaper terms the west end is The Guardian and the east end is The Sun. The councils actions are like plonking a baps out Polly Toynbee on page 3 and asking Jon Gaunt to write a glowing review of the Haringey LGBT asylum seekers mime troupe's version of Starlight Express. Only not as funny.
I am sick to the back teeth of this upmarket city pretence. It's flapdoodle of the highest order. It's not that I don't want my city to improve because much as I mock it I do love my bit of the world. I have never wished to be anything other than Glaswegian -it's a great arsehole detector for a start. If I meet someone and they start sneering at me for being a 'weegie' I know instantly that they are operating way beneath my head and add them to the list of people I don't have to pretend to like. Glasgow is a city blessed with vast reserves of untapped potential and cursed with no-one in authority with the first clue what to do with it. The greatest boxers the world will never know are currently eating and drinking their way into soft flab and waddling around Glasgow picking fights. The world's greatest business brains that will never be used are scamming the benefits system and dealing drugs. Fine orators are bellowing garbled rubbish at bus stops. Philosophers and thinkers are boring the arse of their local. Great politicians are arguing about what her next door said to Natalie fae Haghill on the bus last week. Supermodels are stuffing their face with pies and disappearing under a disfiguring blanket of blubber. If the council put half as much in the way of time and resources into spotting and developing the potential of it's residents as it did into conning tourists with phoney window dressing this city would be the envy of the world and without trying a real tourist destination. Oh and let's face it even if I'm overestimating my fellow Glaswegians, a good education combined with the cheek of the average weegie would be more than enough to wing it.
Cheerio
11/29/2007
7/02/2007
All Hail Oor John!
UPDATE: There are now several ways to honour John Smeaton.
Buy him a pint- the aim is to get to 1000 pints.
Make your very own John Smeaton banner for T in The Park
Thanks Bama_Lou.
4/17/2007
Ask Charlie
'One of the newest MSPs was also one of the dearest. Charles Gordon, who was elected Labour MSP for Glasgow Cathcart last September, billed taxpayers for £3571 for his first quarter in the job, although this included a number of start-up costs, such as a £50 Freeview TV box for his constituency office, and £159 worth of tea and coffee.'Tom Gordon in the Herald, 6 th October 2006.
Hello,
There is nothing Clairwil enjoys more than reminding a cheeky councillor, MP or MSP that I pay their wages. There are two reasons for this, the first is that it's true and the second is that they must be sick hearing it. See, you can goad them beyond endurance without being at all unpleasant.
Anyway I was leafing through The Digger when I chanced upon one Charlie Gordon MSP taking fright at being questioned by a member of the public. It's almost the funniest thing I've ever heard. If you see Charlie on your travels, please ask him a question, taking care to remind him that your taxes paid for his Freeview box. Baiting this man could be more fun than the popular bloodsport of kicking Terry Kelly.
To return to Charlies traumatic encounter with the public, picture the scene. The volunteer staff of Merrylee Matters Community Initiative were doing a spot of gardening when Charlie 'Square-eyes' Gordon came a waddling down the street looking for votes. The volunteers couldn't believe their luck as they hadn't set eyes on Charlie since the last election. Heads full of silly ideas of accountability they seized the chance to ask the reclusive telly addict a question.
One of the volunteers asked Charlie why he'd done nothing to promote the work they did in the community, why he was ignoring the community and stated that he'd done nothing but line his pockets since being elected. A fair point and two good questions, more so when one takes into account the fact that Mr Gordon was head of Glasgow City Council when the notorious Chirnsyde Initiative was given funding.
Rather than just answer the bloody question Charlie and his researcher panicked. I found this detail particularly amusing '.....Gordon's researcher was acting like a child, waving his arms about in the street and demanding that the police come.' The police did come along later and stated that whilst they accepted no-one had been abusive or threatening towards Charlie they would still be charged with breach of the peace if they approached him again.
Like I said before baiting this cretin looks like a lot of fun. There really is only one reasonable response to this. Let's see if we can get his researcher to start bedwetting. We must all ask Charlie a question. Remember keep it polite.
Cheerio
Hello,
There is nothing Clairwil enjoys more than reminding a cheeky councillor, MP or MSP that I pay their wages. There are two reasons for this, the first is that it's true and the second is that they must be sick hearing it. See, you can goad them beyond endurance without being at all unpleasant.
Anyway I was leafing through The Digger when I chanced upon one Charlie Gordon MSP taking fright at being questioned by a member of the public. It's almost the funniest thing I've ever heard. If you see Charlie on your travels, please ask him a question, taking care to remind him that your taxes paid for his Freeview box. Baiting this man could be more fun than the popular bloodsport of kicking Terry Kelly.
To return to Charlies traumatic encounter with the public, picture the scene. The volunteer staff of Merrylee Matters Community Initiative were doing a spot of gardening when Charlie 'Square-eyes' Gordon came a waddling down the street looking for votes. The volunteers couldn't believe their luck as they hadn't set eyes on Charlie since the last election. Heads full of silly ideas of accountability they seized the chance to ask the reclusive telly addict a question.
One of the volunteers asked Charlie why he'd done nothing to promote the work they did in the community, why he was ignoring the community and stated that he'd done nothing but line his pockets since being elected. A fair point and two good questions, more so when one takes into account the fact that Mr Gordon was head of Glasgow City Council when the notorious Chirnsyde Initiative was given funding.
Rather than just answer the bloody question Charlie and his researcher panicked. I found this detail particularly amusing '.....Gordon's researcher was acting like a child, waving his arms about in the street and demanding that the police come.' The police did come along later and stated that whilst they accepted no-one had been abusive or threatening towards Charlie they would still be charged with breach of the peace if they approached him again.
Like I said before baiting this cretin looks like a lot of fun. There really is only one reasonable response to this. Let's see if we can get his researcher to start bedwetting. We must all ask Charlie a question. Remember keep it polite.
Cheerio
3/14/2007
The End Of The World Is Nigh.
Hello,
I like to imagine God sitting about smoking a pipe and wondering what we're all up to. Let's all pray that no-one tells him because if they do we're doomed. When I say 'we' I don't mean you or I. It's a bunch of pervos I'm on about. Namely 'sock sniffers' . Worse still they seem to be into sniffing vile, white sports socks and worst of all comedy socks. I must stress that these are used socks which if the adverts are to believed have been worn by 'chavs' and 'scallies'.
There's no law against this sort of thing or if there is it hasn't come to my attention but y'know yuck. What's the attraction in dirty socks? Why? Bearing in mind that I am a lady, can anyone explain, using carefully chosen euphemisms, what these freaks do with the socks? Is it a big joke or do they really get excited by them?
I'm amazed there hasn't been a sock related sex crime in Glasgow over the last few years. For a while all the neds were walking about with sports socks pulled up over the lower leg of their tracksuit bottoms. I did wonder what they were up to but not for a second did I imagine that they were some sort of exhibitionists on the sock scene.
All that said there appears to be an emerging used ladies tights scene and whilst I can't say I approve, if anyone would like to save me doing a washing I'm open to offers.
Cheerio
I like to imagine God sitting about smoking a pipe and wondering what we're all up to. Let's all pray that no-one tells him because if they do we're doomed. When I say 'we' I don't mean you or I. It's a bunch of pervos I'm on about. Namely 'sock sniffers' . Worse still they seem to be into sniffing vile, white sports socks and worst of all comedy socks. I must stress that these are used socks which if the adverts are to believed have been worn by 'chavs' and 'scallies'.
There's no law against this sort of thing or if there is it hasn't come to my attention but y'know yuck. What's the attraction in dirty socks? Why? Bearing in mind that I am a lady, can anyone explain, using carefully chosen euphemisms, what these freaks do with the socks? Is it a big joke or do they really get excited by them?
I'm amazed there hasn't been a sock related sex crime in Glasgow over the last few years. For a while all the neds were walking about with sports socks pulled up over the lower leg of their tracksuit bottoms. I did wonder what they were up to but not for a second did I imagine that they were some sort of exhibitionists on the sock scene.
All that said there appears to be an emerging used ladies tights scene and whilst I can't say I approve, if anyone would like to save me doing a washing I'm open to offers.
Cheerio
2/23/2007
A Peculiar Experience
Hello,
I have just had what I think I can say without fear of contradiction was a most unusual experience. I was minding my own business, when I was stopped by a very pleasant lady of advanced years who asked if she could tell me something very important.
Naturally I was intrigued as waited with baited breath for this important thing. Nothing could have prepared me for what followed. Nothing! The lady who I shall call Mary said that she'd been looking at me when the Lord told her to go and speak to me. Well you could have knocked me down with a feather! Anyway it transpires that God thinks I'm a very special person and is very upset to see me so sad, he's not bothered that I'm not a Christian because I'm very kind, he also said that I should leave my troubles at the foot of the cross and he'll sort them. Oh and he also said that I'm very gracious, talented, generous and intelligent. So you lot will all have to start treating me with a bit of respect otherwise you'll all end up roasting on the hob of hell. Jesus also gave Mary a few things to pass on to me and seems to be in total agreement with his dad.
Obviously I was flattered but I must confess to becoming a bit suspicious and started to worry that this might be a trap to lure me into church. However Mary didn't ask for a thing, not money, my presence at church, a cup of tea, my shoes -nothing. I was never the most certain of atheists, so as you can imagine I'm a bit spooked, though it has cheered me right up. I did wonder if Mary might be unwell, but she seemed perfectly normal. What can it all mean? Why me? What should I do?
Has this sort of thing happened to anyone else?
I have just had what I think I can say without fear of contradiction was a most unusual experience. I was minding my own business, when I was stopped by a very pleasant lady of advanced years who asked if she could tell me something very important.
Naturally I was intrigued as waited with baited breath for this important thing. Nothing could have prepared me for what followed. Nothing! The lady who I shall call Mary said that she'd been looking at me when the Lord told her to go and speak to me. Well you could have knocked me down with a feather! Anyway it transpires that God thinks I'm a very special person and is very upset to see me so sad, he's not bothered that I'm not a Christian because I'm very kind, he also said that I should leave my troubles at the foot of the cross and he'll sort them. Oh and he also said that I'm very gracious, talented, generous and intelligent. So you lot will all have to start treating me with a bit of respect otherwise you'll all end up roasting on the hob of hell. Jesus also gave Mary a few things to pass on to me and seems to be in total agreement with his dad.
Obviously I was flattered but I must confess to becoming a bit suspicious and started to worry that this might be a trap to lure me into church. However Mary didn't ask for a thing, not money, my presence at church, a cup of tea, my shoes -nothing. I was never the most certain of atheists, so as you can imagine I'm a bit spooked, though it has cheered me right up. I did wonder if Mary might be unwell, but she seemed perfectly normal. What can it all mean? Why me? What should I do?
Has this sort of thing happened to anyone else?
2/20/2007
The Digger Documentary
Hello,
At last, the long awaited BBC Scotland documentary on The Digger has been screened. I have mentioned The Digger a few times here and I must admit I'm a fan, though this programme did reveal the darker side of the magazine which I have been studiously trying to ignore in pursuit of my weekly giggle at the gangsters.
The Digger is a sort of OK magazine for neds or a demented vigilante rag depending on your view. Every week it lists the antics of local criminals- those on the streets, in the police force and in authority. Personally I'd rather it focused more on the police and their dodgy dealings than on the depressing antics of ill educated drug addicts but it is what it is.
I was surprised to learn that it's circulation is now at 11,000 -not bad at all for a 50p self-distributed magazine. I was more surprised still that only two people have been forced out their homes because of it, one being a convicted paedophile whose picture appeared on the cover and the second being The Digger himself, who is the the most unfortunate position of being hated by both the criminal classes and the police.
The programme also featured a poor looking sod by the name of Brian who'd had a contract put out on him after being called a grass in The Digger, something which he vehemently denies being. I was disturbed by the attitude of James Cruikshank (the ruler of The Digger) who didn't care much because Brian is 'a twit'. From what I saw on the programme it's fair to say that Brian probably should repeat a year or two of school but for heavens sake, even I think he doesn't deserve to die. I have no idea what the truth of the story is and in any case the people he's alleged to have informed on sound like total scum, if he did clipe he's done society a favour. I think The Digger made a bad move there.
That said many of the criminals featured are quite pleased to achieve minor fame by appearing in The Digger so it's not all bad news. The programme was not without it's lighter moments in particular the documentary makers stint as the magazines court photographer, which involved a jammed camera and the pursuit of a sex offender through the Gorbals in an attempt to get that elusive cover shot. Sadly the viewers only saw the sex offender from a distance so I'm unable to hunt him down and throw rocks at him for your amusement.
One also has to admire the hard work and dedication of the magazines founder James Cruikshank who carries on in the face of threats both legal and physical. Let's face it there are easier ways to earn a living. Being able to put out a magazine without the backing of the usual publishing and distribution networks, not to mention without advertising is an undeniable achievement not to mention rather inspiring.
Cheerio
At last, the long awaited BBC Scotland documentary on The Digger has been screened. I have mentioned The Digger a few times here and I must admit I'm a fan, though this programme did reveal the darker side of the magazine which I have been studiously trying to ignore in pursuit of my weekly giggle at the gangsters.
The Digger is a sort of OK magazine for neds or a demented vigilante rag depending on your view. Every week it lists the antics of local criminals- those on the streets, in the police force and in authority. Personally I'd rather it focused more on the police and their dodgy dealings than on the depressing antics of ill educated drug addicts but it is what it is.
I was surprised to learn that it's circulation is now at 11,000 -not bad at all for a 50p self-distributed magazine. I was more surprised still that only two people have been forced out their homes because of it, one being a convicted paedophile whose picture appeared on the cover and the second being The Digger himself, who is the the most unfortunate position of being hated by both the criminal classes and the police.
The programme also featured a poor looking sod by the name of Brian who'd had a contract put out on him after being called a grass in The Digger, something which he vehemently denies being. I was disturbed by the attitude of James Cruikshank (the ruler of The Digger) who didn't care much because Brian is 'a twit'. From what I saw on the programme it's fair to say that Brian probably should repeat a year or two of school but for heavens sake, even I think he doesn't deserve to die. I have no idea what the truth of the story is and in any case the people he's alleged to have informed on sound like total scum, if he did clipe he's done society a favour. I think The Digger made a bad move there.
That said many of the criminals featured are quite pleased to achieve minor fame by appearing in The Digger so it's not all bad news. The programme was not without it's lighter moments in particular the documentary makers stint as the magazines court photographer, which involved a jammed camera and the pursuit of a sex offender through the Gorbals in an attempt to get that elusive cover shot. Sadly the viewers only saw the sex offender from a distance so I'm unable to hunt him down and throw rocks at him for your amusement.
One also has to admire the hard work and dedication of the magazines founder James Cruikshank who carries on in the face of threats both legal and physical. Let's face it there are easier ways to earn a living. Being able to put out a magazine without the backing of the usual publishing and distribution networks, not to mention without advertising is an undeniable achievement not to mention rather inspiring.
Cheerio
2/03/2007
Pie Factory Terror
Hello,
I have mentioned The Digger before I'm sure but I can't seem to find the correct post to link back to. Anyway for those that don't know The Digger is a small Glasgow based magazine, well more like a fanzine really and it's wonderful, though very naughty. Unlike other fanzines it's not about music or football but crime and wrongdoing in the city of Glasgow. It's also an invaluable resource for anyone interested in the alleged links between organised crime and the Labour Party in the West Of Scotland. No stories on that front for the last few weeks but experience tells me it won't be long.
Oh and take a tip from me, should you find yourself dining with Jack and Bridget McConnell (see under The Big Conversation anti-social behaviour) , don't mention The Digger or the Lyons. Could make things awkward during the cheese course.
To return to the matter in hand, this weeks Digger contains a tale so remarkable I hardly know where to begin. Perhaps it will be easier if I just give you the facts. The action takes place in Pars Foods in Milton. Imagine the scene, all is quiet as the workers get down to a bit of pie filling when suddenly a commotion! One Ratis Hanberts is alleged to have assaulted a female colleague in the factory changing rooms, attempted to rape another, touched up a male member of staff, forced 'terrified pie -fillers to run for cover' before being pinned to the ground by the factory owner and handed over to the police.
Obviously I don't condone such behaviour but I confess there is a small part of me that admires anyone who makes their first day in a job that eventful. I mean it takes me weeks to drop the obliging facade. This guy was trying to rape all and sundry within two hours of starting his first shift. He even managed to kick and punch the factory owner in the head a couple of times before the police arrived.
As for what provoked such an extraordinary outburst who can say? I have always had my concerns about men being allowed to work with meat. It seems to have an odd effect on them. I've never known a butcher that wasn't a pervert.
I have mentioned The Digger before I'm sure but I can't seem to find the correct post to link back to. Anyway for those that don't know The Digger is a small Glasgow based magazine, well more like a fanzine really and it's wonderful, though very naughty. Unlike other fanzines it's not about music or football but crime and wrongdoing in the city of Glasgow. It's also an invaluable resource for anyone interested in the alleged links between organised crime and the Labour Party in the West Of Scotland. No stories on that front for the last few weeks but experience tells me it won't be long.
Oh and take a tip from me, should you find yourself dining with Jack and Bridget McConnell (see under The Big Conversation anti-social behaviour) , don't mention The Digger or the Lyons. Could make things awkward during the cheese course.
To return to the matter in hand, this weeks Digger contains a tale so remarkable I hardly know where to begin. Perhaps it will be easier if I just give you the facts. The action takes place in Pars Foods in Milton. Imagine the scene, all is quiet as the workers get down to a bit of pie filling when suddenly a commotion! One Ratis Hanberts is alleged to have assaulted a female colleague in the factory changing rooms, attempted to rape another, touched up a male member of staff, forced 'terrified pie -fillers to run for cover' before being pinned to the ground by the factory owner and handed over to the police.
Obviously I don't condone such behaviour but I confess there is a small part of me that admires anyone who makes their first day in a job that eventful. I mean it takes me weeks to drop the obliging facade. This guy was trying to rape all and sundry within two hours of starting his first shift. He even managed to kick and punch the factory owner in the head a couple of times before the police arrived.
As for what provoked such an extraordinary outburst who can say? I have always had my concerns about men being allowed to work with meat. It seems to have an odd effect on them. I've never known a butcher that wasn't a pervert.
1/23/2007
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)