God It's Hard To Blog/ Save the Lollies

Hello,
It may be a peculiar quirk exclusive to me but it's bloody hard to blog when you're happy. Readers may be delighted to hear that I'm feeling very chipper. I've been very busy over the last week with my business stuff and was on a course in London over the weekend.

My tail is also in the air because I've just realised that my current business plan whilst good is rather too ambitious for a start up with my limited resources. I was chatting to someone over the weekend and suddenly realised that I've horribly over complicated everything. I need to sit down and do some hard sums and make a few phone calls but if I'm right I could be in business within the next couple of months. Not only that but I'll have the basis for a plan to expand my business within the next 18 months. I'm also grappling with a job application as I need a stop gap job while I'm getting started and this job pays a good £6000 per year more than my current one, is within walking distance of my home and if I'm honest is one of those made up jobs that provide one of the few skiving opportunities left to the 21st century worker. Assuming I'm successful I'd like to offer my sincere apologies to the tax payer but may it comfort them to know that they'll be helping to fund a business start up so it's not a complete waste.

Still that's enough about me. I want to draw your attention to the plight of the poor Lollipop men and women of Glasgow. The council in it's infinite wisdom has decided to get them picking up litter in addition to their other tasks. In fairness the council have given them a choice they can either pick up litter or take a cut in hours and pay.

Such is the climate of lunacy in the City Chambers they actually think this will make it easier to recruit new lollies. People this is how stupid they think we are and can you blame them? Why do we as a city trot along year after year and vote Labour muttering darkly that we 'cannae let a tory in'. My mums local councillor is a tory and having been in the position for roughly a million years is as pointless and complacent as any Labour councillor. Quite why the thought of a waster in a blue rosette is more terrifying than one in a red rosette has never been explained. All I know is that they must not be let in. Quite frankly I'm not fussy I'd rather The Natural Law Party were in charge than Labour.

Giving the poor lollies more work is an admission of failure on the part of the management of the cleansing department. Let's face it they've proven that the litter problem can be effectively managed -my fellow residents may recall how clean the city was when the Commonwealth Games application was under consideration. I'm awful for getting swept up in things but I foolishly thought that at last the council were starting to get it right. How wrong I was, we were like a fat man holding his stomach in as an attractive woman strolls by. As soon as the application was successful we let our muscles relax and started chucking half eaten kebabs about again.

Of course the wages paid to street sweepers are higher than those received by the lollies which has more to do with the decision than anything else. I understand that the council have a budget to work to and when limited funds are available sometimes cuts have to be made. However I presume the litter that is being dropped by school children and their half-witted parents on the way to school. So instead of making a badly paid but useful job harder why not get the schools involved and get the kiddiewinks litter picking? This would provide the children with an incentive not to drop litter, teach them an important lesson about actions and their consequences and make the place look better. Better still get them to sort the rubbish for recycling and teach them about all the marvellous things that can be made from rubbish if it's put in the correct place. It could be a nice little project for them they could write an essay on it or stand on a chair and bark or whatever it is they get up to in schools nowadays.

Failing that I note that councillors are now paid for their work surely with a bit of time management they could double up a litter pickers. I'm perfectly serious. I'd be rather impressed with any councillor willing to get their hands dirty and pitch in with the rest of us to improve the city. Unless of course our good 'socialist' councillors are far too grand for that sort of thing and would rather place the burden on the lowest paid workers instead.