Bloody Israelis

Hello,
I have entitled this post bloody Israelis to trick you all into thinking I'm going to go on a rant about Palestine but I'm not you'll be relived/disgusted to hear instead I want to warn the women of Glasgow about a menace at large in Debenhams.

The Israeli menace is very charming and talks to one in that I want to marry you way that I thought the was exclusive to Turkish gentlemen but apparently is practised by the Israeli chap too.

I was minding my own business on my way to the hat section when all of a sudden I was pounced on by a chap who wanted to talk to me about the Dead Sea. I'm not knowledgeable about the Dead Sea but I do find it interesting so agreed to follow him to his counter. Before I knew what was happening my hands were covered in salt and I was being told that Mr Clairwil was the luckiest man in the world. Do you know when I related this to Mr Clairwil he snorted! Then refused to explain the meaning of the snort and frantically tried to change the subject.

After being salted, oils and creams and jars of salt started to appear from nowhere accompanied only by somewhat alarming declarations of love from the sales chap. I had, if I'm honest suspected an ulterior motive for all this worship right from the start and was proved right when I asked how much this mountain of salt based products was going to cost only to be told £149.95. Bah! I knew he didn't really love me.

Frankly I consider myself lucky to have escaped only £60 worse off with a free gift that is only available to 'beautiful women' -though I suspect the definition of beauty in this situation is somewhat flexible.

All that said the salt scrub is excellent and has left my skin very smooth -even my hands but suspect the same results could have been achieved with a big bag of sea salt and a bottle of almond oil at a fraction of the price. Then again that wouldn't have been half as funny.

So ladies be warned there is a squad of them roaming Debenhams sweet talking your purses empty.

Cheerio