Much as it pains me to admit it I'm getting humped in this war. Today's attack involves the theft of a plant with red flowers (I don't know it's proper name). I presume the individual (s) responsible for this intend to continue until there is nothing left.
All was well when I checked on the plants at about 11:30 last night. The next time I checked them 10:30 am today the plant was gone. It's the thought of them sitting in their manky student flat giggling at old Bo Selecta videos, overusing the word like in like the wrong place and plotting against me that really gets my goat. Oh how I'd love to burst through their door and torture them all to death. At the very least I'd settle for catching them in the act. Then I'd slaughter them all without mercy. Harsh but fair.
There is something rather puritanical about their evident objection to beauty and apparent desire to see ugliness restored. A glance through the rubbish they dumped yesterday only serves to underline this impression. Layer upon layer of cardboard ready meal sleeves. In other words food to be eaten and prepared without any pleasure or creativity. Functional mush to fill a hole. Maybe it's nature with it's unpredictable sights, smells and textures that alarms them. Their diet certainly seems peculiarly free of any vegetable matter.
Still I'm being positive -through gritted teeth and will now spend the next few days deciding what to plant in the space left behind. I'm thinking of something bright, flamboyant and ostentatious like a passion flower, though the idea of something nasty with barbed thorns looks increasingly attractive.