As planned I took a stroll along to the May Day march in Glasgow today. It was sodding useless! I arrived at one o'clock and wasted thirty five minutes looking at some white people with dreadlocks standing about doing bugger all. It's hard to muster much respect for the dreadlock sporting white chap at the best of times but today's non events took the biscuit.
I'm sorry but I cannot even begin to sympathise with people with such a casual attitude to time. Anarchists need to realise that some rules were made to be kept. How on earth to they expect to bring down global capitalism if they can't even agree to do something at a particular time? Poor time keeping is never going to get the public onside. People respect good time keeping. Think about it. What is the only nice thing people ever say about that fat fool Mussolini? If you guessed 'even Mussolini got the trains to run on time' go to the top of the class. These anarchists would do well to pay attention to the example of Mr Mussolini and his timeous trains, though it would be best if they ignored all the nasty fascist business and refrained from invading Ethiopia and the like.
Of course the police were out in force standing about clocking up the easiest overtime they've ever earned in their lives. You could almost hear them thinking 'hmmm- new conservatory or a trip to Disneyland'- the swines!
I'm starting to wonder if it's my presence that turns people into such pointless tits. My whole life I've been plagued by the feeling that everyone else is of somewhere having a marvellous time and I'm being excluded. For example look at these anarchists and their tricks. I doubt very much whether these tricks do much to bring about change, though I'd be happy to be proved wrong, however they are pleasing diversion and a hoot.
I tried a similar trick in my own youth by making flyers for a night at a club that didn't exist and left them about the place. Not for any real reason, I just felt like it. Of course I was acting alone on a low budget and couldn't make much of an impact, though I hope at least one person was puzzled. Sadly I've met very few people in my life who are into mischief in any sort of way. I seem to attract 'oooh we'll get into trouble' types' or worse the 'that is so immature' brigade. I pride myself on my immaturity as frankly the alternative is being a prematurely old bore who is obsessed with the 'point' of things all the time.
However I remain optimistic, somewhere out there is a gang of class clowns just waiting for my guiding hand to spur them on to greater heights of mischief. The one thing the internet has convinced me of is that I'm not alone in the world. The search for actors of the giddy goat continues.
Oh sorry forgot to mention- this is really funny.