As readers from the 'tripod year' will be aware I was once a member of the Scottish Socialist Party. Imagine for a moment, Clairwil keen as mustard attending the odd meeting every time I remembered. You don't know just how close this country came to revolution!
Anyway the first few meetings I attended were fantastic. There were debates, questions and interesting speakers. With hindsight it was all going too well. I can't say I wasn't warned, everyone seemed to take the view that they admired Tommy Sheridan but thought his party were complete and utter nutjobs. I would look at them, my eyes full of missionary zeal saying 'oh but you're wrong'.
Then I went to a meeting where a man asked me the following in front of a room full of startled onlookers 'what are you going to do to bring about a socialist Scotland? Well I had no idea what to say. My education has been sadly deficient in many areas and I'm afraid it hadn't even touched on the means by which I personally would bring about a socialist republic. I tried laughing in a manner which suggested the answer should be obvious, unfortunately that came out as a giggle. All eyes were on me, the seconds that felt like hours ticked onwards. I could not think of a single word to say. Eventually a gentleman and I mean a real gentleman intervened, explained that none of us had joined the moonies and that it was a stupid question.
I shall not go into great detail about the women's meeting mainly because it was the most traumatic politics related event of my entire life. I merely made the point that cracking down on prostitution would only drive it further underground and make things worse for prostitutes. For that heinous crime I was patronised, then abused and finally told that I was 'right-wing' and 'anti- feminist'. At no point did anyone put forward a reasonable argument in a reasonable way. I did not hate women before that meeting and I did not hate women afterwards. I do, however hate that repellent, dogmatic, hysterical gaggle of thick feminist bitches. I hope every last one of them expires painfully from womb cancer and has their corpse gang banged by wolves. I am not bitter.
I stuck with them for a bit longer and kept paying my subscription until they sacked Tommy Sheridan for being accused of having had sex. At that point I left. I thought I might still vote for them in the future but no longer wished to be actively involved. I cringed at the sight of new leader Colin Fox as he strutted up and down Argyle St dressed as Robin Hood campaigning during the May general election. And you thought George Galloway on Big Brother was embarrassing.
If you are or have ever been left-wing you will probably have been accused of being 'loony left' or a silly idealistic fool at some point. For example my brother used to call me a 'free the bum and ban the bomb merchant' before locking himself in the bathroom and singing 'Rule Britannia'. My brother is a Liberal Democrat. There is a long history of eccentricity in my family. Naturally as a black clad fifteen year old Marxist I did not see the funny side of this behaviour at all. Now I think it's hilarious, apart from Rule Britannia. That is a red rag to the Clairwil bull. Though I concede someone sitting on the toilet singing it is funny.
There is a point to all this. The SSP have decided for reasons that utterly infuriate me that Scotland requires a new flag. Not for any sensible reason, like another country has turned up with the same flag or a wee change. No, nothing so sensible. Apparently it's a 'dated relic'. I concede that it's older than last week however this is an insufficient reason to change it. It is also a 'Christian symbol' which does not reflect the beliefs of the secular majority. Oh yes and we also have a sizeable Asian population who are not Christian.
Like Colin Fox, Ayub Khan is also very concerned about this issue, stating 'Whenever I change my car I stick the Saltire badge on the back. I also wear the Saltire on my T-shirt when I go to Pakistan. 'I have two identities, my first is as a Muslim, and my second as a Scot. I’m proud of the Saltire and don’t think it should be changed.' Gosh! poor Colin must be furious, He's just spent all that time and energy talking to Scotland's Asians, finding out they're hopping mad about the flag and Ayub Khan of the Multi-Faith Coalition goes and spoils it.
I realise that the Saltire has it's roots in Christianity, however it is more widely associated with the legends surrounding the battle at Athelstaneford. Or here's a theory most people just think of it as Scotland's flag and don't give it's origins much thought. As a flag I like it, it is both simple and memorable, which is all one can ask of a flag really. The proposal is that it should be scrapped and replaced with a rainbow flag to reflect our cultural and ethnic diversity. What the fuck for? For a start the ethnic make up of a country changes over time, how will the rainbow flag remain relevant to future immigrant groups? Secondly there are other counties far more ethnically diverse than Scotland, what if they want a rainbow flag as well?
The whole suggestion is nonsensical. Fox is a fuckwit. Come the next Scottish elections I urge the electorate of Scotland to ensure he gets the boot.