There I was in work today training a group of new volunteers when the impossible happened. I met someone I hate more than my irritating work colleague. I arrived at the training room to find two volunteers had arrived early. I started setting up the overhead projector and suddenly became conscious that one of them was starting at me with barely concealed contempt, he turned to the girl he was talking to and said 'sorry, I'm still listening, I'm just watching this farce'.
I ignored this and carried on with what I was doing. All through the training session he moaned, harrumphed and spoke to me with a sneer. However the best is yet to come. At the end of the training I handed out evaluation sheets. My nemesis filled his out and made a great show of handing it to me, the questionnaire is anonymous so he obviously wanted me know what his answers were. The answer to the question 'Can you think of anything that would improve this training session?' is a killer. He wrote the following 'yes, don't send Vicky Pollard to do the training next time, yeah, but,no,but,yeah,but,no,but,yeah' and so on.
I have no difficulty articulating myself, I bear no physical resemblance to Ms Pollard nor do I dress like her. What in the name of God is he on about? I can laugh at myself, I don't mind a well observed funny dig at my expense but his 'Vicky Pollard' remark is none of those things. I have no idea what provoked his evident hatred for me, I'd never met him before. The only similar incident I've ever encountered was when I caught a middle aged trainee moaning that he was expected to answer to a 'daft wee lassie'. That was easily dealt with as I explained what my credentials were and suggested he might want to volunteer elsewhere as most of the paid staff were either daft wee lassies or mad old bags.
My new nemesis has a totally unjustified superiority complex. I hate him. If I hadn't been so taken aback by his behaviour I would have simply said to him that he was only jealous because I've got a job, whereas he has spent the last eighteen months on the dole.