11/08/2006

I Think I'm Paranoid.

Hello,
Actually I'm not so sure that I am paranoid, it seems as likely as anything else that The Guardian is actively trying to wind me up. Far fetched? Well the alternative is that they mean it and that's just unbelievable.

Today's gem is and I am not making this up is 'Oscar Wilde -was he really a crashing bore?' Well in my opinion, which is the only one that counts in my world, the answer is a resounding NO! However I am thirty-one and take the bus to work, which I believe makes me a failure in the eyes of some mad, old bat or another. I forget who though I seem to recall she had a nice line in handbags.

Anyway strolling back towards the point Kathryn Hughes, who I'm sure is a fascinating human being reckons that compulsively witty people are a bore. Saints preserve us! I suppose it was unlikely I'd share many views with someone who authored a biography of Mrs Beeton. Charming as I'm sure Mrs Beeton was, think of all the wonderful souls that have sashayed across the planet, Elizabeth the first, Cleopatra, Cora Pearl, Lola Montez, Quentin Crisp, Julie Goodyear and that's not even the tip of the iceberg. I myself am thinking of writing 'Emperors Wives -a bonktastic look at the wives of the Roman elite'. Not once has it occurred to me to research the life of a well known 'domestic scientist'. As far as I'm concerned cooks should write functional recipe books without injecting their tedious lives into them or be Fanny Craddock. The middle ground is for people who should be ignored until they make their woolly minds up.

Mind you, the Oscar Wilde that I admire has no real place in The Guardian. I like naughty Oscar 'feasting with panthers' and turning the world on it's head. Kathryn suspects that he practiced his lines in the mirror before he went out and sneers at him for it. I on the other hand, hope that he did, in the pursuit of perfection. Maybe Ms Hughes' pitiful article heralds the beginning of Wilde being reclaimed from the shallow, stunted, joyless, PC wankers. Maybe we shall be able to read an article about Wilde that doesn't treat him like St Oscar the gay Christ. Could it be that we jokers, strollers and mischief makers are getting our man back? I do hope so.



Cheerio

Just for fun, can you all flash mob this shop? Go on please me.

8 comments:

iLL Man said...

Can you imagine her at parties? She'd end up locking all the charming and witty people you invited in the spare room before telling everyone else to sit down and behave. Silly old trout.

Clairwil said...

Dear God! Isn't she just an total bore? I bet she's only down on wit because her 'witty' friends wear comedy ties and act wacky. She's a washed out dishrag.I don't hate her but I dislike her with a fair degree of intensity.

Anonymous said...

The Hughes woman is a misguided fool. Without sharp cookies like Oscar, her ilk would have free reign over this planet. Then where would we be? I believe she may be mixing up Mr Wilde with the boring man in the tweed jacket, flat cap and red v-neck who stands in the local pub all day making jokes about 'the coloured's' and emitting gas loudly before saying to the barman "You'll have to buy that now you've ripped it" or "A bit more choke and she would have started" to absolutely no laughter but his own......

Clairwil said...

Auntie Pauline,
You are quite right. If I'm very good will you be my Auntie?

Anonymous said...

Clairwil my dear, i'm everyone's auntie. Look..........
http://auntiepinthehouse.blogspot.com/..........but yes, if you're very good I may apply to have you adopted.

Anonymous said...

Clairwil my dear, i'm everyone's auntie. Look..........
http://auntiepinthehouse.blogspot.com/..........but yes, if you're very good I may apply to have you adopted.

Clairwil said...

How wonderful Auntie Pauline! Can you really solve my problems?

Anonymous said...

I'll give it my best shot dear. When i'm not getting my tired old head round this blogger thingy.

Auntie P